Comments on: Primal Wound Book Tour

By: Emily

Emily — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 04:11:45 +0000

“I know my relationship as my daughter’s mother is not diminished because of her relationship with her birth mother.” Bravo!

I tend to agree with you about legal guardianship. It sounds well-meaning, but I think the net effect would be the child not having a secure sense of place in either family.

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!

By: Yorkchic

Yorkchic — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 07:46:28 +0000

You are so brave, and I’m so proud of you Lassie. (p.s. I still haven’t read the book!)

By: Nicole Burton

Nicole Burton — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 16:20:25 +0000

Very thoughtful posts and comments with which I concur as an adopted person. I’m totally warmed when I hear that adoptive parents are actively engaged in open adoptions and all the struggle that entails, and that they have grown beyond their fears – awesome! As my original mother used to say, “interesting lives are not tidy ones.” Adoption is a life-long condition that we the adopted have to learn to deal with. It’s wonderful to have a diverse and extended community in which to do this. Cheers, NB
BTW, the first three chapters of my book, SWIMMING UP THE SUN: A MEMOIR OF ADOPTION are available in print and audio at NicolJBurton.com. Enjoy!

By: Geochick

Geochick — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 20:07:37 +0000

Good comments! I’m part of the tour also.

The so-called fairy tale ending of “adoption instead of abortion” distracts us from the reality of grief associated with adoption.

Well said! Before going into this process I think both my husband and I while not subscribing to the entire “fairy tale” did not understand the depth of loss on all sides of the triad. Society doesn’t want to hear about it so as adoptive parents we realize while we are navigating the tricky parenting waters we will have to be educating others at the same time.

By: Paula"chosen"

Paula"chosen" — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:34:40 +0000

I am an adult adoptee and also apart of this book tour. I honor you for confronting your fears and for finding tools to loving your daughter to wholeness. If this information had been available to my parents so that they could have validated my grief and helped me process through it, we would have fared better. Our family was great, but there were things I did and said that could have been curbed had they understood where my trouble stemmed from. After reading ‘The Primal Wound’ I have finally found validation that my personal struggle was real and normal. I have found a wholeness and freedom from the information presented in this book. I want you to know that I truly believe your daughter will be able to bond with you because you acknowledge the ‘Primal Wound’. Day to day you are looking out for her and now you are equipped to help her and allow her to be real about who she is and what she is feeling. To me this is the most important first step in the process of bonding and establishing your mother daughter relationship. I love my mom and now after reading ‘The Primal Wound’ am I able to feel her love and freely give her mine on a much deeper and natural level.